Some people never cease to amaze me…..

Posted: July 15, 2005 in Friends

So I have this friend. This friend happens to be female. This friend happens to JUST be a friend. This friend happens to be one of my best friends of over 4 years.

Well, she also happens to be married, which is great. She wasn’t married when I met her, and she got married a few years back. Well, she is going through some tough times, as they are fighting about typical things. I happen to know that she loves him very much. I do not know how he feels. I know she loves him very much because I talk to her a few times a week, and it seems like she is always having a hard time with life. But when you are going through those hard times, shouldn’t your husband be behind you, trying to make things better, or at least a bit OK?

Lately, he has been wanting her to sleep with me. You know what? I don’t really feel good about that, because I respect the vows of marriage. My parents split up because (and dad, if your reading this and I’m wrong, please correct me) a friend came between them in their relationship. You know something? I don’t want to be that friend. I never have, in all the relationships that I have had with women, wanted to come between them and their significant others (now if she’s on the rebound slightly different story)

But somehow, I think he feels something that he is not communicating to me. Which is very sad, because I value him as a friend as well.

But that’s not the point of tonights story. The point is, my friend is feeling very down about things, they are fighting about money. Now I understand that is a big thing in just about every relationship known to man. Having said that, lets get to the best part.

So I am sitting there talking to her, when my mom calls on the other line (I happened to have been on my cell phone at the time, because I was sitting out by the pool) So I get done talking to my mom, and click back over to her. I am on hold. Ok that’s fine, I have unlimited nights and weekends, I can stand to waste a few minutes.

What happens next, I could never fully describe here. She gets back on the phone, and she sounds distraught. She was with him at his parents house, which isn’t that far from where they live. apearantly, he had left the family vehicle there, and decided to bike home. Once home, he decides to call her and tell her that she deserves better than him (which I guess has happened before) and she comes to find out that over there with him is a girl that wants to sleep with him, that he hangs out with a lot. He says there is nothing going on there, and I don’t really know the situation. She feels that he is cheating on her, and I am almost inclined to believe it. She DOES NOT like her, and all I have to say is, from what I have heard, I don’t like her either.

So, tell me this (for both the men and the women out there) If you and your significant other had just gotten into a fight, and you later found out that they had gone off with someone who has a history of coming between you and this other person in your life, what would be the first thing you think?

So any ways, this is where she had to go, I hope to explain what was going on to his parents, to hopefully get some feedback. She had told me that if she drove home now, it wouldn’t be a pretty picture.

Since I know she reads this blog, I hope everything went OK, and please do not hesitate to call me if you need anything (within reason of course ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

Sorry for the long post, but some things need more words than others.

  1. Me says:

    You need to extricate yourself from the situation. It’s obvious that you do care about your friend, but it’s also obvious you have feelings for her you’re either in denial about or simply not admitting to here. That will only serve to fuel the already raging brushfire between the two of them. Back off and let them solve their own problems. Later, you can be freinds with her again, when her weenie of a husband finally moves on.

  2. mnxmfan says:

    Why is it that everyone always assumes that when a guy is friends with a girl, there has to be some feelings involved? It just doenst make sense. I mean A: I am staying out of it. I am trying to be a friend by talking to her on the phone and offering a voice of reason for her? I mean the reality is this… we are great friends. I respect her, and I respect the fact that she is married.

    I am at home, and she is off hopefully not doing anything stupid. I AM staing out of it, otherwise I would be still on the phone with her, or with him. I wouldn’t go as far as to call him a weasel either, because I only have one side of the story, so I cannot accurately make a statement regarding that matter. From what I’ve seen, he’s a good guy, with a low self esteem, but who knows, I could be wrong…

  3. Bunny says:

    The reason the first person likely thought the way he/she did was because there are a lot of guys out there that don’t have good intentions, and take the opportunity to be the “good guy” when times are difficult.

    If I were your friend I would most assuredly think my significant other was cheating on me, because a lot of times things are exactly as they seem, and perhaps seek counceling if that were a possibility.

    I hope she and her husband worked things out and it was just a small bump in a long, happy marriage. You’re a good friend to be there when she needs someone.

    — Great blog! I look forward to more updates. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. mnxmfan says:

    The reason I respect the vows of marriage is because I live by the old attage “treat others as you would like to be treated”

    Besides, if someone is going to cheat on thier husband with me, what kind of future does that leave for me, and how could I possibly trust that they wouldn’t turn around and do the same thing on me?

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